As a media outlet that regularly pays homage to the hind quarters and fatty assets of female anatomy it would almost seem cliche for us to comment on the First Lady’s backyard.  It’d almost be like crying wolf since we’ve addressed virtually every ass in the game to date.  But Erin Aubry Kaplan of the highly respectable Salon.com blogs about Michelle Obama’s defining quality…her junk!

“What really thrills me, what really feels liberating in a very personal way, is the official new prominence of Michelle Obama. Barack’s better half not only has stature but is statuesque. She has coruscating intelligence, beauty, style and — drumroll, please — a butt. (Yes, you read that right: I’m going to talk about the first lady’s butt.)”

And does she ever.  Her very eloquently and carefully weaved commentary portrays the First Ladies backyard as not only a defining characteristic but one representing the beauty that is black women.  Naturally there were plenty of uptight bourgeois folk out there who were outraged by Kaplan’s audacity.

“While it isn’t humongous, per se, it is a solid, round, black, class-A boo-tay. Try as Michelle might to cover it with those Mamie Eisenhower skirts and sheath dresses meant to reassure mainstream voters, the butt would not be denied.”

Her ascension to the white house, Kaplan notes, represents an arrival, a liberation that lets all black women of distinction with similar build no longer feel ashamed of the anatomical differences from their white counterparts and instead enables them to take pride in the booty and flaunt it as if a rare beauty mark.

“Thanks to Michelle, looking professional and provocative in a distinctly black way will become not only acceptable but also part of a whole presidential look that’s more, well, inclusive. Now we’ll all be able to wear leggings to board meetings; we’ll sport pencil skirts sans the long jackets meant to cover the offending rear at big conferences where we have to make a good impression. It turns out that Sir Mix-A-Lot, he of “Baby Got Back” fame, was not a novelty but a prophet. Who knew? Give that guy a Cabinet post.”

Hey we were thinking it…but Kaplan said it, I’m just reporting.  Michelle’s arrival and Aubrey’s gluteous endorsement opens the door for many of our Fat Back award winners past and present.  No longer will they feel constrained to the role of video vixens and King Magazine covers and black men’s website eye candy just because of the bodacious appeal of their hind parts.  You too can ascend to glory…never again let your ass keep you back. 

Peep her entire commentary here